Dis-tanced
Disconnected... Disoriented... Dissonant... Dischordant... Disassociated... Displaced.
It's been a few months since I've gotten back from Kabul. I've gotten a full time job at an airport here in town. I've been trying to work out what's next. Where to go and what to do. It's odd though, while I'm back where I'm "from" I'm finding I have to work at "encultureating" just as hard here as anywhere else I've been. Things that seem evident to me are either inconcievable or immediately discounted. Attitudes are different, minds that are thought to be 'open' are in reality open only so far as to let in things considered 'safe.' The status-quo is worshipped and instability and risk are unheard of. People are insulated from the 'unsanitary' to such a degree that they can deny the very existance of it. It's a continuing process of determing and balancing the realities of existance here (job, housing, transportation, etc.) with the desire for engagement and interaction with cultures and people different from my own. It's more difficult than I thought; to balance work, rest, hang-out, and cultural/social exposure. In addition the constant struggle to NOT give in to the "normal" definitions of success/failure, religion/state, and morality increase the fatigue and frustration. Not to mention the political climate in beautiful conservative Oklahoma... Hopefully I can refine and define these frustrations a little better in the future. Or I could just leave again...
It's been a few months since I've gotten back from Kabul. I've gotten a full time job at an airport here in town. I've been trying to work out what's next. Where to go and what to do. It's odd though, while I'm back where I'm "from" I'm finding I have to work at "encultureating" just as hard here as anywhere else I've been. Things that seem evident to me are either inconcievable or immediately discounted. Attitudes are different, minds that are thought to be 'open' are in reality open only so far as to let in things considered 'safe.' The status-quo is worshipped and instability and risk are unheard of. People are insulated from the 'unsanitary' to such a degree that they can deny the very existance of it. It's a continuing process of determing and balancing the realities of existance here (job, housing, transportation, etc.) with the desire for engagement and interaction with cultures and people different from my own. It's more difficult than I thought; to balance work, rest, hang-out, and cultural/social exposure. In addition the constant struggle to NOT give in to the "normal" definitions of success/failure, religion/state, and morality increase the fatigue and frustration. Not to mention the political climate in beautiful conservative Oklahoma... Hopefully I can refine and define these frustrations a little better in the future. Or I could just leave again...
posted by Erros | 11:44 AM
3 Comments:
So are you overall unhappy with where you are? Not that I know exactly where you are "staying" but I know the state....
More or less, but there is too much to describe to go here... there really will be more on here later. Promise... ;)
So is your newer post the "more to go with this post"?
PS- If I forget to check back for your comments my email is kiliblog@cox.net (or at least the one I use online when I show one)
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